What the snow?

Yes, it’s baaaaa-aaaaack.

 The snow.

The ice.

The cold.

                          Gray…..…

                                                                    Lifeless…….

                                                                                                      Merciless……..

                                                     

                                                                                                                                                  ….Skies of DOOM.

(insert screaming sounds here)

The last few weeks I’ve been leaving the house without my coat. I guess it’s just that “Oh, there’s no snow on the ground yet soooo it can’t be THAT cold” mindset that I have (Now there’s snow on the ground and I can’t use that excuse). Honestly, I think I’ve been in denial. Actually, I think I still am. In October, I was actually kind of looking forward to the coming winter. Now that it’s actually here….well….I want to move somewhere warm and sunny. Last night when I was laying in bed under like, ten thousand blankets, shivering, I closed my eyes and pretended that I was at the beach. I imagined the warm rays of sun…the splashing waves…the high pitched screams of all the annoying twelve year old girls that just discovered what a leech is (yes we have tons of leeches in the Mitt). I imagined what it would be like to not have to wear big bulky sweaters and wool socks during the winter. I considered blowing my college savings and treating myself to a trip to Hawaii. I can almost feel the soft breeze on my face; I can see the palm trees swaying. I can hear those people with the silly flower necklaces, singing out of tune along with their ukuleles.  I can see the ocean…I can—

(happy ukulele music stops abruptly)

I’ve lived here in Michigan my whole life. Yes I probably have a romanticized view of the world beyond Michigan in which there is no winter. Truth is, I haven’t *really* been far outside the mitten. I mean, I’ve been to Canada…but Canada and MI are one in the same except we only say “Eh?” at the END of every sentence, as opposed to every other word.

I’ve been to Ohio three times and I must conclude that it’s the dullest state I’ve ever been to. Of course I must admit that my view was from that of the turnpike and therefore I suppose I can’t judge the whole state on the 300 miles of fields I did see.

I’ve been in Wisconsin…their cheese is better.

Now Pennsylvania….I want to live there. Be-a-u-tiful.

New York…kind of scares me. The accents…? Boston. Eh…

So like I was getting at…I haven’t been anywhere warm and tropical. Really though…I don’t care about the tropical part! I just want to see the sun again! I’m ready to hitchhike to Phoenix AZ! I saw on the news a few days ago that it’s still in the 80’s there.

I heard a rumor…that the ski hills are open. You know what this means? I’ll tell you what this means. It means that I have to go get my snowboard waxed (because I have no clue how to do it myself), and pretend that I enjoy being outside, for the next four months. Maybe five months. The only upside I can think of would be snowmobiling. And I could even live without that. Yep. That’s right. I said it.

So why don’t I move away, you ask?

Because when it isn’t snowing….Michigan is the loveliest place in the world. Or one of them. In the springtime, right around my birthday, the woods springs to life. The buds on the trees, unfurl to show off their new leaves. The trilliums (so called endangered, psh) and the little pink wildflowers, positively cover every open woodsy piece of land. And of course you can find squirrels the size of small rabbits, scampering around (usually running from my insane dog). Every once in a while, you see new fawns with their tiny white spots, following their mother through our yard (or garden more like).

So yes, even though Michigan’s winter is longer than its spring/summer….the latter is what makes living here so worthwhile. And beautiful. Because it’s the only way for me to make it through the winter (dramatic sigh), I will hold on to the coming summer and deny the cold for as long as humanly possible.